A Little Piece of Heaven in my Pocket

Day 9. Yes, day 9 of the rest of my life. I have officially shown the door to a huge part of my life. I really thought that this break-up would make me sad, but I've been getting on pretty well. It's not my husband with the break-up in question. I have officially said good-bye to sweets and treats. Even the low-fat, no carb, Splenda sugar treats. They have done me wrong more than once leaving me still hungry and hugely depressed after our sick binge sessions together.

Last Sunday, after two days of eating like crap (I won't sugar coat it), I was feeling bloated, icky, and terribly guilty. I sang my little song to myself and danced my little dance about how I already knew the outcome and I went and did it anyway. I cried to my mom and she said, well just stop eating it! Huh! Yeah, if it was that easy, don't you think I would have done it by now?

No, she said. You have a very bad and addictive relationship with sweets and snacks. Treat it like any addiction and don't eat any of it ever! Give it a try for 3 weeks and maybe that will help break some of those bad habits. You may not ever miss them.

I agreed and starting from that point at 8:30 pm on September 7th, 2008, I have not eaten sweets or treats. Surprisingly, things are going well. I even had a potluck at school filled with very tasty comfort food including many things on my "no" list and I opted for the healthy chili, fruit, and veggies. Pat on the back for myself.

Nutritionists everywhere would be gasping...you can eat anything as long as it's in moderation. No, it will truly not work for me.

So here I'm sitting after leaving the lunchroom. A sweet little girl placed a tiny yellow Starburst in my hand. I said I would put it away in my pocket and have it as a treat after lunch. One little Starburst. It's quite a predicament to be in. I put it in the hand of a colleague and have been thinking about it ever since.